Wed 31 Aug, 2022

Change will only start happening once you decide you want to do better, show up better and be better

Before I sat down on the floor of my bedroom, I knew I had enough of being hurt all the time, I was tired of being upset and was tired of constantly feeling let down. However, the difference in this moment was that I knew any change wasn’t going to happen externally. I knew that any change that I wanted to happen in my life had to come from within me.

What happened after this thought, happened instinctively.

As I sat on the floor of my bedroom, I placed my hand over my heart and breathed. I breathed big, deep belly breaths. I let myself feel, I let all the feelings rush into my body as I breathed deeply and sobbed uncontrollably. I just knew within me I had to let go. Let go of all the pain, the hurt, the suffering and anger. I breathed and let go.

As my eyes were closed and tears fell hard, I also knew I had to surrender myself there and then to that moment. Surrender to the earth holding me, surrender myself to this feeling and let it take me. Allow myself to be cleansed.

What followed after, was a deep feeling of trust. Trust all that was within me, all that came from me and all that will follow. I knew I had to trust the process, trust the universe and more importantly trust myself. Before I knew it, let go, surrender and trust was my daily mantra during meditation for over a year. It worked.

Change will only start happening once you decide you want to do better, show up better and be better.

Allow yourself to be still, allow yourself to feel. It will be painful & uncomfortable but through this we can see growth. 

Just like a lotus, beneath the mud is a beautiful flower waiting to bloom.