Thu 1 Sep, 2022
‘The Higher Self Is Whispering To You Softly In The Silence Between Your Thoughts’ – Deepak Chopra
From this seat of consciousness
I am aware
I bear witness to all
that is around me
I pass no judgment nor shame
I observe.
I thank myself for being here
Not getting tangled in a web of thoughts,
stories that I have made up
I am the observer
I am me.
Today (30th August 2022) is the day Surekha and I decided to fast from speaking, we used no devices, we chose this time to really connect with the body and the breath and go inwards. And boy did I go IN! I’m not going to lie, it was really hard when I woke up, to get started, I was grumpy and angry, I was still half asleep. I usually meditate and journal in the morning but doing a full 6 hours of silence was really daunting. However, the first thing I did was sit on the sofa, pull out my journal and start to write.
It was important for me to set an intention for this morning and for this practice. My intention was to ‘be present’. It’s something that I have been struggling a lot with recently and I knew in order to fully get out what I needed from this experience was to be present with myself and everything that I was doing. I wanted to approach the time ahead of me with kindness, appreciation, non-judgment, patience and love for myself.
I spent a whole hour journaling, letting my thoughts pour onto paper, writing is where I truly find freedom. Freedom to let my heart and soul roam the pages in front of me, unfold and breathe as they intend to. Writing is where the brutal honesty of me and life come pouring out; no inhibitions, unguarded and untamed.
After journaling, I chose to pick up my book ‘The Untethered Soul: The Journey Beyond yourself’ by Michael A.Singer. It was funny because the chapter I read was about who we are. Who are we beyond our jobs, our roles, our history? How do we find out who we are when we are surrounded by an incessant inner voice (us)? If you close your eyes right now, what do you hear? Is it silent? Or do you hear someone talking to you, saying ‘Why am I doing this?’ ‘This is stupid.’ We are constantly surrounded by noise, whether that be our own voices in our heads, or the distractions of what is happening around us. Michael A Singer talks about going deep within yourself to find that ‘seat of consciousness’ ‘it’s from this place you can see all your thoughts and emotions as well as outer form.’
Being in stillness and silence today was about sitting back, far deep into my seat of consciousness and just observe. The seat itself – the soul-self energy who observes, is aware. Emotions and thoughts are there on the outside beyond, that is form – what you see in front of you. Come back to soul-self energy, The Observer. The one who is aware. Aware of the thoughts passing by; why do we have to get caught up in this narrative? The seat of consciousness is where you find bliss.
It’s hard though isn’t it? I was talking to my partner, and I would love to be in a meditative state permanently (Deepak Chopra stated he is always in a meditative state now and doesn’t react to the comings and goings around him) but how hard is that?! What I am finding difficult is the balance between being in my seat of consciousness as well as having to navigate through the humdrum of life. So these 6 hours were difficult but so worth it. My plan is to now dedicate at least 4 hours every two weeks or every week to be still and silent and allow the power of my inner self shine through. This is where all the magic happens. This is where you can watch the pain slip away, the teachings you need to hear from your higher self, the answers to the questions you have been yearning to ask. This is where you find it all.
Even though these 6 hours were a mixture of being tough but also incredible, I learnt so much. I’ve connected to myself in a way I haven’t done in a long, long time. It was an incredible feeling to find my way back home. I spent more time journaling, writing poetry, which I haven’t done in a while, meditating, movement and I went on a long nature walk. All the while, connecting to breath, connecting to my soul-self energy.
As a thank you for signing up to my letters and hopefully getting to the bottom of this, I am going to share an extract directly taken from my journal, it’s very personal but I hope you gain something from it:
Thank you for this day. I am grateful for the time and space to do this. I am grateful for the privileges we have in life. The luxury of time, the luxury of space, of money. I am grateful. I am grateful for the knowledge and wisdom that gets passed down. I am grateful for the choices we have in life & the opportunities. We have endless amounts of abundance & we still believe we lack. There is still something lacking, but there isn’t. We have it all. It’s all around us. It’s ours to claim. We have enormous amounts of privilege. Our ancestors, our grandparents and parents have worked tirelessly to allow us the opportunities we have now. How lucky are we? The hard labour they endured, the discrimination, the hardships, the battles they faced. The ever changing environment so we can be here – to live freely, with ease. Recognise it. Be thankful and recognise. The power and privilege I have to be able to share this right now. Thank you for this day & for the days to come. I step into my power, knowing the difference I can make.
Ayesha x